Something Lost, Nothing Gained
by Osteria
Summary: Starscream muses over the past while holding onto the lifeless form of a hatchling and wonders about the fate of his own. Takes place in ROTF, the scene where Megatron breaks open two pods. Mentions of past mech-preg.


Disclaimer: Transformers is the property of Hasbro and I am using the characters without permission or knowledge of the original creators. I am making no money with this story.

A/N: I thought I would try my hand at actually posting something. I am defiantly writing out of my comfort zone so please let me know how I did. This story contains reference to past mech pregnancy so if you find that offensive then please do not read any further.

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Starscream stood alone as he watched his illustrious leader stream towards the base on the dust ball planet the humans called Mars. Dread filled his tanks. Starscream had actually enjoyed some measure of peace with the death of the tyrant, peace and a certain joy that he was now leader of the Decepticons. However, it was quite clear that not all the Decepticons had felt that he was worthy of command. He had given strict orders to leave the fallen leader be, finding energon fot the hatchlings was their first priority!

"Damn you, Soundwave," he cursed quietly to no one in particular. There was no doubt in his mind who had orchestrated this resurrection.

Starscream moved back further into the shadows, not that it would offer any protection just delay the inevitable. His processor was already reeling. What to tell Megatron that would appease his temper enough that Starscream would be left in one peace. Groveling, he hated it, but it was a tactic that had served him well in the past and so it was what he prepared himself for. A small shudder went though him at the sound of the mech landing. There was no ignoring the deep resonating sound of the tyrants mocking voice. There was no avoiding their meeting anymore.

It all went down just as Starscream suspected it would. He groveled while Megatron beat him once more. It was like the tyrant had never left. However, this time Megatron had aided in the death of not one but two of the hatchlings. The mechanical glitch didn't even flinch when the pods broke open and Starscream was helpless to do anything but watch as the small helpless forms fell to the ground crying.

The grip on his throat cables finally released and he allowed himself to slide to the ground with the small writhing form. It was clear that only one hatchling still held to life while the other's spark had extinguished already. A part of Starscream was still aware of Megatron spouting some degrading comment which he knew was directed at him but he really didn't care so long as the mech left. With a gentleness that no one who currently knew Starscream would think him capable of he scooped up the little body that had fallen to the ground.

It held to life but just barely. He clicked to it softly and was rewarded with a weak answering coo. Starscream retracted the armor on his forearm and pulled forth a medical access energon line that was used for emergency energon transfers on the battle field. It was a long shot but Starscream felt that he should at least try. Diverting some of the flow from his internal lines he allowed for a slow trickle to form as he held the tubing to the mouth of the hatchling.

With what little strength the creature had it reached out and held onto the offered line. Starscream felt his hopes rise slowly, perhaps he would be able to save at least one of the creatures. However, his hope was short lived when the hatchling started to choke and sputter as energon flowed back out of the small creatures mouth.

"No," Starscream muttered his dismay as he cut off the flow of energon. He gently tried to get the small bot to swallow by massaging the creatures throat cables but nothing happened. Starscream ignored the indignant whirls and clicks the hatchling uttered in anger as it was handled roughly. Starscream used his talons to gently pry open the hatchlings mouth to peer at the throat components.

The problem was quite obvious now. The hatchling was simply too young, the swallowing components had yet to be completely formed by the building nanites in its immature systems. Starscream felt his tanks churn. Once again there was nothing that he could do to save this life. A part of his processor didn't understand his own logic. He cared nothing for the Autobots that he shot down, in fact, he quite enjoyed it but this was different. This was the future of their race! The last chance for Cybertronian life to continue beyond the war. It was possible that these new lives could also be what tipped the balance of power in the Decepticon's favor.

Starscream stopped trying to legitimize his actions to himself and simple held the small creature to his chasses, humming to it to calm its small cries.

"There is nothing I can do to save you little one," he muttered softly to the hatchling. Dimming optics met his own.

It didn't take long for the small form to let out one last shudder before the optics finally went dark, the form limp and lifeless. Starscream stood but didn't put down the hatchling. Instead he let the lifeless form slip from his chest plates, holding onto the tail and lifting it up so he could look at the creature. The partially formed sparkling was odd in appearance with no real discerning features.

"I wonder who your creators were?" there would never be a way to tell for sure. Starscream hazard another glance about himself to the thousands of pods that hung about him. This was the last horrible crime that the Cybertronian Senate had committed against the very mechs that they ruled. Forcing the premature birth of all sparklings and their subsequent placement in stasis pods until such time it was deemed by the senate that one should be allowed to hatch. Then the hatched sparkling would not go back to its creators but instead to a mech who had placed an application that the senate had approved.

Population management, energon rationing, finding new ways to solve coding problems in hatchlings, shortening the carrying time of a full vorn, limiting the stress on the carrying mech, the list of reasons given to everyone was long but it all pointed to one cold unequivocal truth, control. In one fatal swoop the senate had gained complete control of everymech.

There were a number of factors that led to the civil war that Starscream and the others fought, but the hatchlings had been one of the deciding points for him. He had a sparkling once.

Thousands of vorns ago Starscream had a partner form the Science Academy, Skyfire. They had been close friends and one overcharged night had led to something more than just friendship. Even through the overcharged haze Starscream knew that what they did was wrong and what it could ultimately lead to, but that didn't stop him nor Skyfire.

Starscream let one of his clawed hands drop to the middle of his waist where his reproduction chamber rested. He had carried for a few month with no one the wiser, even Skyfire had not known, and he had worked so hard to keep it that way. There was no way he was going to give up his sparkling to the Senate and their stasis pods, he wanted to carry to term. It had been a brilliant plan, he would go on an extended exploratory mission for the Academy. He would convince Skyfire to go with him and then Starscream would reveal his condition to his friend. There would be no doubt in Starscream's processor that Skyfire would agree with him, that the their sparkling didn't need to go into stasis. After all, what could the senate do if the sparkling had already been birthed?

However, it would seem that Primus did not agree with Starscream. It was an accident but that did nothing to ease the ache in Starscream's spark. One moment of inattention from both Starscream and Skyfire was all that it took for the crash to happen. Some nameless planet void of life in the middle of a distant galaxy was the last place Starscream ever saw his partner alive. Oh, how he searched, he searched for what the humans called years but he never found anything. Not even a faint spark reading. He had no choice but to return to Cybertron for help but he was unprepared for the greeting he received. There was no help to be found for Skyfire, instead Starscream was charged for his death and the sparkling he carried was taken away.

When Megatron came about shortly afterwards, there was no hesitation in Starscream when he put his own name down on the roster. When he was given the order to attach the Senate he held nothing back. No pleads for mercy reached his audios as he ripped them limb from limb. As he flew back to Megatron covered in copious amounts of drying energon he felt no remorse and Megatron had smiled at him. That had been the official start of his military career with the Decepticons.

Shortly after the first battle the Autobots made their first stand against the Decepticons and while all attention was diverted Starscream and his trine secured the hatchlings from the Senate's vast storage. The Autobots, the idiots that they were, thought that the Decepticons had destroyed the hatchling center. The fools never once thought that the Decepticons would be interested in preserving their future.

Once again for the millionth time Starscream wondered which one of the hatchlings belonged to him and Skyfire. Absently he looked to the small form that still dangled from his grasp, what if this one?...No! He wouldn't think that! No, his sparkling was still safe somewhere in his pod waiting.

Starscream shook himself out of his nostalgic thoughts. They did little to further his goals so he let them go and moved towards the Fallen and Megatron, absently realizing that he had yet to let go of the dead hatchling.

"If we do not find a new energon source the hatchlings will keep dying!" he whined at the two other powerful figures who paid him little mind. Starscream absently wondered when it was that he lost his courage and passion, but then he knew what had happened and it could be summed up in one word. Megatron. The beast had beaten him into playing the role of a sniveling cowered and he accepted it for the moment as it suited his needs. However, it was not a role he planned to play forever. Starscream let the metallic corpse fall to the ground finally as he watched Megatron turn to leave.

"My dear air commander," whispered a sickening sweet voice dripping with mocking sympathy. "You seem so sad."

Starscream sneered at the beast, he hated him almost as much as he did Megatron perhaps even more. No matter how he tried he simply couldn't keep anything from the ancient mech. He seemed to know that Starscream had once carried even without the ex-scientist saying anything and he needled Starscream about it at every opportunity.

"I am fine." Starscream snapped back not wanting to have a conversation with the other mech.

"Aw, but I beg to differ," the other snickered. "I can feel your pain at the loss of yet another sparkling."

Damn him! Starscream clinched his claws but tried not to let himself be bated. This creature cared nothing about the hatchlings. He was too wrapped up in the destruction of his brother's legacy. Of course, energon would be a byproduct of said destruction but just like Megatron, both parties had long since lost sight of what they were supposed to be fighting for.

"Perhaps you wish to carry again?"

"Damn you!" he snarled out loud this time. His anger was met with a amused laugh form the Fallen.

"You know you would enjoy it..."

"No!" the venom in his voice was intense as he raised a fist to the ancient mech who just smiled at him. They both new that no matter how much Starscream wanted to strike, he wouldn't. It would mean Starscream's death if he did. Starscream passed unneeded air though his vents in a simulation of a human sigh as he lowered his fist.

"I will never carry for you." He said simply as he turned away. He needed to go back to his hastily constructed lab in the back portion of the base. Just in case things went wrong he wanted to have his own plan. He did not trust the Fallen's plan of destroying Earth's sun. Starscream had learned a long time ago that it was never a good idea to underestimate the tenacious nature of Prime and those goody, goody bots.

Starscream tuned out the sound of seditious laughter behind him. The day would come again and Starscream would become leader once more and he wouldn't lose his power so quickly to anyone again. Not till he set right all the wrongs done to him. They would pay, all of them would pay.


End file.
